Monday, September 19, 2011

Project #1 – 30 Minutes

So, after a false start over the weekend, let's jump into the 5 Day Husband Project!

 

Project #1

30 Minutes is All it Takes

Create Some Free Time When He Gets Home

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”
~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

Your Project

Focus on your husband's transitional 30 minutes today. Would he like to be left alone to rest and rejuvenate, or does he want some undivided attention from you? This doesn't mean you have to meet him at the door with a martini and a fresh batch of cookies and become June Cleaver (at least not all the time). The point is to let your husband know you value what he does out in the world, and that he has a safe loving place to come home and get refreshed at the end of the day.

Getting Creative
There are plenty of reasons why it might not be easy for you to give your husband or significant other some transition time at the end of the day. You need to look at what can work for your relationship. Be creative, like the stories listed below. Brainstorm with your friends until you find a situation that will work for you and your guy. Some ideas include:

  • One wife purposely scheduled her daughter’s dance classes twice a week at the same hour that her husband gets home from work. That way, her hubby comes home to an empty house. He gets some quiet, and she gets a more peaceful man.
  • One husband has his workshop out in the garage. His wife encourages him to go and hang out there for a while before dinner. (Since starting this arrangement, her husband has started helping out with the after-dinner clean up. Nice side benefit.)
  • Crockpots are The Husband Project’s best friend. Set your crockpot to be finished thirty minutes after your husband gets home from work. Let him know that you don’t need anything until dinner is ready. Don’t know a crockpot from a flower pot? Check out the recipes in The Ultimate Guide to Man Food at www.kathilipp.com
  • Does your husband already have a great transition routine after getting home? Find some other little thing to bless that time. Maybe it’s making sure the TV is available, his favorite sweats are clean and ready to be changed into, or there’s a cold soda waiting for him in the fridge. It may be so small that he doesn’t even notice. That’s okay – you’ll know what you did.
  • What if your husband works from home? Maybe the best way to help him relax is to ask what he would like the schedule to be. Does he want dinner before or after he gets some time to recharge? Ask him what would make his night better.

How it went…

So this is a little different for my own situation. I just started a full-time job which I commute 45 minutes home from and my hubby works largely from home right now. So since there is no real transition time for him, upon arriving home I make it a point in the 30 minute time after I come home to ask about his day and show how interested and appreciative I am of what he has done. And a big thing is to pay more attention to the hubby than the puppy! Plus, I try to have dinner already planned out, so neither of us is frustrated trying to think of what’s for dinner which makes us a little more calm in the evenings. My honey is very happy to show me all that he has accomplished and enjoys the break from working mostly by himself. I’m always so proud when he shows me what he’s accomplished – even the little things!

What did you do?

After you complete this project, come back and post your results for Project #1 below, every time you post your results to a project, you're entered to win a copy of The Husband Project! For additional entries, post your results after each project. (i.e. you can enter to win up to 5 times by posting your results on every project) Put your name in your post so I can notify you in my giveaway winner announcement post! At the end of the project I will pick a winner at random Sunday 9/25 evening.

7 comments:

  1. I decided to jump in and try this project tonight! Transition time is a pretty big deal to my husband since he works 10-12 hour days, out in the sun and usually with a commute involved. Since I'm a stay-at-home mom, I usually welcome him (and adult interaction) home with open arms as soon as he's through the door. Truth be told, on occasion an 11-month old baby girl may be in those arms ready for the immediate hand off! Once he gets settled in thats when I usually hit him with what my plans (or our plans) are for the night. Tonight I decided to ask him what HIS plans were and what HE wanted to do rather than pushing my agenda on him. I picked a good night to ask because all he wanted to do was relax as it had been a physically demanding day for him. So what if we'd previously planned a trip to Home Depot? So what if it meant I missed my Real Housewives of Beverly Hills because he wanted to watch a movie on HBO? We still spent time together with our daughter which is most important and fulfilling to us both. How did the night end? He simply said "thank you for going easy on me tonight" which made me chuckle and realize my mission had been accomplished :)

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  2. That's great! Sometimes a delay in 'plans' can be so worth the peace it can create for our husbands, and in turn, for our family!

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  3. I started this project tonight and I gave the kids a project to do in the backyard that kept them busy when my husband came home from work. After the first five minutes I think he realized just how calm it was in the house and he became much more relaxed. I felt like we had some real bonding time!

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  4. This is something I need to work on. My husband works graveyard shift, so when he gets home at about 7:15 a.m. I am usually still in bed or at least groggy (I know 7:15 is not that early, but our little one still keeps me up at night on occasion... especially lately with teething). I know my husband loves it when I'm up and about when he gets home, though. I am going to start setting my alarm again (I have let Maddox be my alarm until now) for a half hour before he gets home so I can be fully awake by the time he gets home. That way I can be up to greet him and ask all about his night and rub his shoulders a bit or something. I will post again tomorrow to let you know how it goes.

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  5. This seems to be difficult for myself as well since I am the one who works Graveyard while he has "bankers" hours..I have planned to go to sleep earlier to be sure that I am awake in the evenings. Spending time to just talk about his day and just relax watching the news really makes a difference.

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  6. Okay, so I committed to being more awake when Jeff gets home in the morning so I can greet him and visit with him less groggy. It went well the first morning! He was happy to get his shoulders rubbed and have a cuddly wife to come home to. It is so hard to make my hubby top priority these days with a little one in the picture now. I know my hubby appreciates the effort though.

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  7. Yay girls! I know it's gotta be tough when you and your man are on different schedules, but it sounds like making an effort to be more awake at his time every so often helps! Awesome jobs!

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